I might be sick, but....

I'm not going to follow the footsteps of the rest of dad's side, I don't want to be obese, overweight, nothing. I want to be lean and I want to have the body everybody else wants, nobody ever envied me for anything and I wish I could feel that for once. Just for once, i'd like to have something nobody else did. Now i'm just regular and boring... I wrote a list with my flaws, I just needed to get them out.


Nose - It's too long and it should be slimmer and straighter
Chin - it isn't in proportion to my nose, it should stick out a little more for a balanced profile
Shape of face - I wish it was slimmer and more heartshaped
Forehead - I have the alien syndrome
Eyes - Too small, nice color though I wish they were lighter and more shock blue
Skin - One word; Terrible
Eyebrows - Nice slim shape, but located too low
Arms - Too fat
Legs - Too fat and cellulite is killing me from the inside, I scrub them bloody and it doesn't help.
Body in general - Too fat and my vains show too much, like my skin would be see through and not only the important like the once in my wrists. I can see bloodvessels under my skin around my ribcage.
Feet - Too wide
Hands - Not slim enouge fingers, they should be slimmer and longer
Tits - just horrible, too small, wierd shaped, nipples are a fucking MESS! Not in proportion to my body
Wrists - too fat
Ears - They always look wierd somehow, but they are nicely sized and they have a good angle.
Hair - In progress, not platinum enouge
Hips - Way too wide. One word; Disgusting.
Cheeks - Too fat
Ass - Nothing good to say about it
Back - I try to stand up straight, but I can't hold it that way plus the area around ribcage is fat and disgusting.
Shoulders - Too wide
Height - Too tall with the unflattering weight, a fucking hippo, I look huge.



I'd rather be penciled shape than this disgusting mess, it needs to die. It's one of the worst bodytypes ever brought into this world, at least a fat chick can diet and have a small figure, but I can never do that. It's like a punishment for being me - i'll always be gross, I can't make my shoulders more narrow, I can't make the hip area more narrow, I can't narrow down my feet, I can't be shorter, My ears will always look wierd and my back never turn out good, no matter how much I work out, even when I weighed my least it wasn't good. To maximize what I have I need to hit the golden number 45 and I need my skin to grow thicker in some way, laser maybe? Nose and tits are fixable, almost at least, so is my chin. But I have to live with the disgusting Rhitard forehead.

I absolutley hate myself - deal with it.

Thinspo. This girl in the first pic is perfect