Some people are good well lucky and they don't even realize it, my mother is running my life although i'm 18 fucking years old, missing a day in school is a deadly sin, she'd rather have me kill myself than skip school and do something that could make me feel actually good about myself for one fucking secound, something that's rare in this lifetime and life. But what pisses me off mostly is when people complain about it.
"OMG! I don't know what to do, it's this and this and I need HEEELP!"
and I do bring the answers to them, I can actually tell them what to do, so I do, but then they respond;
"Well, I don't wanna do that, it isn't any fun and yada yada yada.."
Well, then there is NOTHING I can do, I helped you, go somewhere else complain about your broken nail, I have more important issues to solve, I can help people that appreciates my help and listen to my advice instead. I have no problem talking about more difficult problems that won't be solved over a day, but those are the problems that matter to me more, in my priority, a suicidal friend is more worth than the fact you ran out of mascara this morning. Little things that break you down and you don't know why - that is a problem, discuss it with me, but don't get hooked on the one and same detail without making sure I understand this isn't just about you having split ends, but there is an underlaying factor, because if little things like that get you down, there is.
There are diffirent kinds of people, two main types; the once who are open with their problems and talk about them out loud whatever it is, that can bring a lot of good sides for themselves psycologically. Being open and honest with others and yourself is a step towards accepting the situatuon and doing something about it. The other one likes to bury themselves in others problems instead of dealing with their own, I know people who are like that (i'm REALLY not like that myself) and it only brings badness into the picture. It supresses and it kills you inside. There needs to be some kind of releasemechanism, if it's talking, wrighting, painting, organizing non-stops, doesn't matter, just something. But sooner or later the problems will come back up and bite you, better to solve them sooner rather than later when they've grown bigger.
There are subtypes to these, of course the mythomaniac, the people who get pissed off if you even mention their problems, there are the people who are just generally quiet when these things happen, or people who become more social as an escape from thinking, workoholics, the people who takes the pain out on everybody else who's around, the people who starts to complain about absolutley everything when they are feeling bad....
Or, the best of them all, the "all my problems are more important than yours" types of individuals, they don't have energy to walk up the stairs today - so they are gonna have a fit if I do want to walk because "i'm so tired, I can't do this anymore", which I think is understandable. But then when I have a mental breakdown they litterally asks;
"What's for lunch today?"
What the hell is that about? I'm having a severe breakdown, i'm going insain, you don't even try to say anything helpful, instead you ask "what's for lunch?". Not a "maybe you should go talk to the councillar or this or this person, they know what to do".
But people are more complex than to just put them in one category, many of the elements can be in the same person, depending on what's bothering them and so on... But there is such a thing as saying "I don't feel up to talking about this right now, maybe you could look for someone else?", not just asking what food there is today.
I had a friend who helped me through admitting I had problems with my eating when I was younger, she didn't know ANYTHING about it, but she made sure I ate, she followed me to the councillar, at least she did what she could and she wasn't feeling very well herself. That's a real friend. Sadly, we aren't close anymore, I miss her a lot, I wish we became closer again, but I don't think it'll happen. Those times were better than any part of my life because I knew I had a stabil friend in my life I could always count on.
I'm sorry I can't feel sorry for you trying to choose between the two guys you are dating because I have none, i'm sorry I can't feel sorry for you having to try to fit in time with all your friends because mine doesn't want to be with me, i'm sorry I can't feel sorry for you when you "only" get a B on an essay when I have to fight stressdyslexia to pass the grade in a subjects I used to get top grades in, i'm sorry I can't feel sorry that you can't remember your old classmates phonenumber when I can't remember my childhood or my early teend. Or mid-teens for that matter.
/LillyRose <3
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